Archive for January, 2018

New beginnings…


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Just breathe…


I’m looking out of the window to my office and I see trees with no leaves. If I didn’t know any better, I might think these trees are dead. The sun sets over the ocean and if we didn’t know any better we might think it actually goes into the ocean. A man was imprisoned some 400 years ago for suggesting the Earth isn’t the center of the universe. And we’ve all seen “water on the road” but don’t panic and slam on our brakes.

Just like these, our lives can sometimes appear to be so many things other than okay from our limited perspective. If we go deeper, we will always discover that the truth doesn’t change; that everything is indeed unfolding as it should, and we truly are okay.

The experience is similar to viewing a really, really big tapestry. Our view is often so close that we see these large hairy pieces that look scary and make no sense (not that we don’t often believe we can make sense of them). But as we back way up (or go deeper), we see that those hairy, scary pieces are woven together to form a breathtaking picture. The tapestry didn’t change. The only thing that changed was our perspective or understanding. xo

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All you need is love…


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Wisdom’s whispers…


For the last two years all I want are heart related things and things in pink, red and white this time of year. I’ve never been that interested in Valentine’s Day in the past so I don’t know why I suddenly feel so attracted to these things but I’ve learned to just follow these little prompts. Last year this interest led me to dust off the book idea that resulted in the recent reprint of the book and the other goodies.
When I am being led I often feel an attraction to something–it’s something that I WANT to do. I am led through a sense of joy but I’ve learned there’s always something bigger behind it. It’s rather like following a trail of breadcrumbs (or cookie chunks for me). I’ve learned to trust it, not to judge it, and to follow it. When following our heart, the problem is often that we think we need to know the why and we don’t usually get the why until later. For example, you might really feel like you want to go shopping but your head might say that you don’t have money for shopping. If you follow it you might find that you meet someone, run into someone, see something that gives you an idea that leads you to the next step, or any number of things. There’s really no telling what it will look like.
Year’s ago I went through a period when I had zero money (and I mean nothing) but I was also having very profound spiritual experiences. I was staying at my father’s house one day and while cleaning the living room I saw a little red car park across the street. I felt a little nudge to go talk to the person in the car. I thought it was a bit crazy and had no idea why. Then I saw a “for sales” sign in the window.
I didn’t have a car and had no money for a car so I couldn’t imagine why I would inquire about this car but thought to myself, “Okay, if the license plate says JLL on it (my initials), I’ll go talk to this person.” I slowly walked down the driveway and when the license plate came into view it read JLL (with some numbers).
To make a long story short, I got the persons contact number and then forgot about it. Within a few days a friend who was traveling through town handed me check that covered the amount of the car and everything I needed to get it on the road. Like a sweet wink, on the way to the Secretary of State, there was another car in front of me with JLL on the license plate. I’ve never seen another car with JLL in the license plate since. I later used that little red car to start a business.
Note: When I write about following or listening to your heart, I never mean the romantic, sentimental heart. I mean that inner Voice, the inner Wisdom, your inner GPS. xo

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A laugh a day…


I underestimated the healing power of laughter until I went through a period when it seemed every aspect of my life was being swept away by hurricane force winds. I had great difficulty functioning and taking care of the most simple tasks during this time but noticed that if something made me laugh even the tiniest bit, it was like a little piece of me mended. I began to seek out things, anything that made me smile or laugh as it seemed to be the only thing that helped.
It was around this same time that I started Princess Sassy Pants quite by accident. I couldn’t take care of myself in so many ways at the time but found great solace while creating the often silly images, and I could quite literally feel myself healing.
Many things have changed since then but I still look for any opportunity to laugh and to be silly–and laughing at myself is often my best material. I used to become upset when something happened that might be a little (or a lot) embarrassing, for example. But now I get excited knowing that I’ll have a story and a memory that will make me laugh for years to come! Now if there were only a way to cover them in chocolate. xo

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I didn’t always believe this having grown up virtually without any parenting and what little there was, was critical at best and abusive at worst. As a result of this and other challenges I was extremely shy, afraid of everything, and just didn’t have a reference point for the idea that there was something intrinsically beautiful inside me. I wouldn’t change anything about my early life however because the deep pain I felt caused me to dig very deeply within myself–something I don’t know that I would have done had I had a different experience.
These aren’t just nice or even just hopeful words. There is a brilliant and indescribably beautiful light within each and every one of us where nothing is impossible. It’s available to us at any time if we choose to look for it but we often don’t search until and unless we experience profound challenges in life. Why would we? If everything is “going great” in our estimation, why look anywhere else? And believe me, the very best things you can imagine pale in comparison to what we find in this place of peace.
However much life’s challenges may not feeeel good, herein lies the gift they offer. When we feel the discomfort of that grain of sand (or a boulder) we have the opportunity and are motivated to discover the pearl. It is and always has been, shining and patiently waiting within our own being. But don’t just take my word for it…

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Just breathe…


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Stay Weird!

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Being “weird” has been my life. I never fit in while in school and later, after I began having some very profound experiences that changed the way I saw everything, I became even more strange to those who didn’t feel deep questions burning within them about life (which unfortunately includes a lot of people).

Staying weird isn’t just about trying to be different just to be different. Rowing our boat in the most populated stream of life often requires us to quiet our inner voice. That voice, that inner GPS, doesn’t usually follow well trodden paths but forms new ones, and this takes courage. To muffle the whispers of my heart and to compromise my integrity so that other’s would approve, like, and include me, is a price I am not willing to pay.

Sometimes it’s necessary to pay lip-service to “normal” because not everyone is ready for us weirdos and it would be unkind to push them beyond what they are ready for. Although we might even appear “normal” on the outside our fellow weirdos recognize us and if you’re here, there’s a good chance you’re one of us. Congratulations! (Wink.) xo

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After finding myself in too many not-so-enchanted-wood in life, I learned that my ideas of what I need aren’t necessarily the best for me…shocking. I learned to trust and to be led rather than forge ahead through obstacles. This isn’t always easy in our culture where we’re taught that knowing is good and not knowing is bad. If we don’t know what to do, what are passion is, and what direction we should go in we often think something has gone wrong. I have found that too many times and however well intentioned I might be, I have been so mistaken about my best interests and the best interests of others that NOT KNOWING is the best place I can be.
When we think we already know something, anything, we are closed (for example, if I really thought that 2 + 2 equals 5 and thought I had the answer I wouldn’t even look for or be open to learning the correct answer). When we’re so certain we know, there’s no room for any other possibilities to enter. It can feel very strange to really accept and sink into the idea that we really don’t know but once we do, we become open to possibilities. We truly become open to magic and miracles.
A simple way to begin is by starting the day by looking at some of things you think you must do that day. Close your eyes for just a moment and say “I think I need to do blah, blah, blah today but maybe I’m mistaken. Maybe I don’t know what I need to do today for my best interests and the best interest of others. I am willing to listen to other possibilities.” Then go about your day but pay attention and be willing to change your plans as much as you can.
Just remember that you don’t get the whole map when you’re being led, you just get the next step. And the next step will feel good but a little bit scary (like butterflies in your stomach scary). xo

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