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I didn’t always believe this having grown up virtually without any parenting and what little there was, was critical at best and abusive at worst. As a result of this and other challenges I was extremely shy, afraid of everything, and just didn’t have a reference point for the idea that there was something intrinsically beautiful inside me. I wouldn’t change anything about my early life however because the deep pain I felt caused me to dig very deeply within myself–something I don’t know that I would have done had I had a different experience.
 
These aren’t just nice or even just hopeful words. There is a brilliant and indescribably beautiful light within each and every one of us where nothing is impossible. It’s available to us at any time if we choose to look for it but we often don’t search until and unless we experience profound challenges in life. Why would we? If everything is “going great” in our estimation, why look anywhere else? And believe me, the very best things you can imagine pale in comparison to what we find in this place of peace.
 
However much life’s challenges may not feeeel good, herein lies the gift they offer. When we feel the discomfort of that grain of sand (or a boulder) we have the opportunity and are motivated to discover the pearl. It is and always has been, shining and patiently waiting within our own being. But don’t just take my word for it…

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Just breathe…

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Stay Weird!

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Being “weird” has been my life. I never fit in while in school and later, after I began having some very profound experiences that changed the way I saw everything, I became even more strange to those who didn’t feel deep questions burning within them about life (which unfortunately includes a lot of people).

Staying weird isn’t just about trying to be different just to be different. Rowing our boat in the most populated stream of life often requires us to quiet our inner voice. That voice, that inner GPS, doesn’t usually follow well trodden paths but forms new ones, and this takes courage. To muffle the whispers of my heart and to compromise my integrity so that other’s would approve, like, and include me, is a price I am not willing to pay.

Sometimes it’s necessary to pay lip-service to “normal” because not everyone is ready for us weirdos and it would be unkind to push them beyond what they are ready for. Although we might even appear “normal” on the outside our fellow weirdos recognize us and if you’re here, there’s a good chance you’re one of us. Congratulations! (Wink.) xo

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After finding myself in too many not-so-enchanted-wood in life, I learned that my ideas of what I need aren’t necessarily the best for me…shocking. I learned to trust and to be led rather than forge ahead through obstacles. This isn’t always easy in our culture where we’re taught that knowing is good and not knowing is bad. If we don’t know what to do, what are passion is, and what direction we should go in we often think something has gone wrong. I have found that too many times and however well intentioned I might be, I have been so mistaken about my best interests and the best interests of others that NOT KNOWING is the best place I can be.
 
When we think we already know something, anything, we are closed (for example, if I really thought that 2 + 2 equals 5 and thought I had the answer I wouldn’t even look for or be open to learning the correct answer). When we’re so certain we know, there’s no room for any other possibilities to enter. It can feel very strange to really accept and sink into the idea that we really don’t know but once we do, we become open to possibilities. We truly become open to magic and miracles.
 
A simple way to begin is by starting the day by looking at some of things you think you must do that day. Close your eyes for just a moment and say “I think I need to do blah, blah, blah today but maybe I’m mistaken. Maybe I don’t know what I need to do today for my best interests and the best interest of others. I am willing to listen to other possibilities.” Then go about your day but pay attention and be willing to change your plans as much as you can.
 
Just remember that you don’t get the whole map when you’re being led, you just get the next step. And the next step will feel good but a little bit scary (like butterflies in your stomach scary). xo

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Unfortunately hard times often reveals your forever friends and your faux-ever friends.

True story…

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